Joyful and abundantly thankful, relieved, to hear my dear friend has been found cancer-free, will not have to go through chemo or radiation treatments. Able to let out the deep breath I had not realised I was holding in.
Rain crashing down all night, a wet winter here (more gratitude) and fields awash, ditches brimming, the landscape drenched. A tide of green rolling across the veld.
This will be another tough month financially, petrol subsidies for NGO work cut, medical bills, vet’s bills, unforeseen expenses. But the store cupboard will provide meals of tuna with white beans, sardines on toast, sweetcorn fritters, refried Mexican red kidney beans, soups of lentils and split peas, baked butternut, dried pasta enlivened with rocket pesto from the garden. The lemon trees outside hang heavy with yellow citrus. The dog food has been bought. There will be enough here to feed unexpected guests or the homeless who come to the door. On we go — and the housemate calls me from the small village of G in the mountains to say there are cows grazing on new sweet grass that grows right up to the steps of the library building.
And on we go, another day of opportunity, beginnings, losses, the soft breath coming and going like a blessing, the land revived after rain.
By Czeslaw Milosz
Love means to learn to look at yourself
The way one looks at distant things
For you are only one thing among many.
And whoever sees that way heals his heart,
Without knowing it, from various ills—
A bird and a tree say to him: Friend.
Then he wants to use himself and things
So that they stand in the glow of ripeness.
It doesn’t matter whether he knows what he serves:
Who serves best doesn’t always understand.