Walking around a neighbour’s garden and peering at the ground to try and spot fallen pecan nuts amongst the curling brown and blackening leaves. The skies dark, the wind giving us ear ache. A small handful for our trouble.
Coming back home and choosing not to think again about the politics of incest, the minotaur in the labyrinth. Just staying in the day, the dog’s welcoming bark, messages from friends left on my cell phone.
Alone in the house and treating myself to a recording of Glenn Gould’s The Well-Tempered Clavier from Bach.
Gould was a genius. Eccentric, but the music is flawless. He hated live performance which he compared to vaudeville. While playing the piano he hummed continuously, swayed and clutched at the air. The temperature of the recording studio had to be extremely warm and the piano raised on wooden blocks. He himself sat on an old chair his father had made for him, no higher than 14 inches above the floor, a small rug beneath his feet.
He disliked being touched and wore gloves to shake hands. He was fond of solitude. Like Arnold Schoenberg, Glenn Gould was enthralled by theories of reincarnation and mystic numerology. He believed that he would be reincarnated two years after his death as Sam Caldwell, a media theorist and contrapuntal poet. Nobody seems quite sure if he was joking.
Yehudi Menuhin said of Glenn Gould: ‘No supreme pianist has ever given of his heart and mind so overwhelmingly while showing himself so sparingly.’
Listening to Gould play Bach or Beethoven is to become the composer for a brief glorious moment, to participate in Bach’s vision, to hear what he heard with an inner ear. Gould knew how to listen. He knew how to share his gift, that utter awareness.
Gould is amazing. I like to listen to the Goldberg Variations on vinyl sometimes, though his eighties versions are better.
I was Googling Glenn Gould and happened upon your blog. I think it is curious how even on the web there is some sort of serendipity, for lack of a better word. I have not read your other blogs, just scanned through, realizing that perhaps in addition to your multi-faceted life, you are overcoming addiction. I live with an addict and I am contemplating moving far away from him. It is very painful and interfering with my physical and mental health; all brought on by my own “sick” sort of loving, as far as I can understand. Not sure why I wanted to say hello, just glad you are writing. Writing helps me. Thank you for sharing.
P.S. My Glenn Gould inquires were brought on by my study of music. I did not realize he died so young; 50 years old.